goats
My mission...
Posted: 3 years ago
My missions is to claim shenanigans on every one of your ludicrous stories, so lets begin...
SHENANIGANS!
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Posted: 3 years ago
ThePenitentMan said:I didn't say they would be true you silly kike
SHENANIGANS!!!!
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Posted: 3 years ago
Another time I was on top of this chick railing her, and due to both the fact that I was shit-stomping hammered and the fact that my it was covered in chick juice, my right hand slipped and I fell straight down, headbutting her in the face and giving her a bloody nose.
I, being the philanthropist that I am, came on her tits instead, then allowed her to deal with the nose issue.
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Posted: 3 years ago
As Charles Barkley said in Space Jam...
IT WASN'T A DREAM!!!! IT REALLY HAPPEN!!!
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Posted: 3 years ago
Also he is a master of driving shitfaced and telling the cops he was just looking for "The best blowjob I ever had"
WHAT A NIGGERISH COMMENT
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Posted: 3 years ago
I can't deny that.
I just want to screw that chick's brains out though...I mean if NIGGA CHARLES couldn't resist I HAVE to try that
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Posted: 3 years ago
No way son I would just fuck her with a bottle of Mr. Clean like a week before I raw dogged her
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Posted: 3 years ago
dude there would be all kinds of open sores and shit
what is wrong with you dude all I said was fuck the bitch with a bottle of all-purpose cleaner before raw dogging her repeatedly so I wouldn't get the clapping crabs
then you gotta get all gross and shit
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Posted: 3 years ago
That reminds me of the time I fucked a 36 year old.
Good times had by all, except me, because she was the crappiest lay I've had yet.
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Posted: 3 years ago
When I was just a wee lad of 18, my ex was going down on me, I was reclined on her bed. She popped up for a minute unexpectedly, I came unexpectedly at an interesting angle, and let's just say I was unable to see out of my right eye for about an hour and a half.
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Posted: 3 years ago
Sado-kun knows the pain
Another time I was 69-ing this chick, and I am not a fan of the 69, so I kept putting her back on for the real deal. She would go for like 2 minutes, then go all spider-man back to the 69. After a while I started wondering what her deal was, and in the midst of this introspection, she straight hit me with a blast from the anal orchestra right in the face.
The true value of this story is not in the hilarity that ensues, but in the question it begs:
WAS THE ENTIRE REASON SHE WANTED TO 69 SO BAD SO SHE COULD FART IN MY FACE?!
I implore ye, O gentle reader, aid me in this quest for closure.
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Posted: 3 years ago
Vernand said:That reminds me of the time I fucked a 36 year old.
Good times had by all, except me, because she was the crappiest lay I've had yet.
Obviously this is a lie, as MILFs/GILFs are the greatest fuck a man of ripe-old age will ever have, and I DO know from experience. Let's just say when you wake up at a Days Inn in Atlantic City next to a chick that wants to show you pix of her grandkids, you learn a couple things.
Silver Fox, man.
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Posted: 3 years ago
ThePenitentMan said:Silver Fox, man.
How much time do we have?
Enough time to 69.
Oh you're just like Don Knotts.
Oh hello Mayberry.
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ThePenitentMan
"A LONNNNNNNNG jew SPELL"
Slutbag (Rank 11)
Is to dominate the NSFW forum with shameless recountings of hilarious and disgusting nonsensical anecdotes lived by me or my friend Chip who you may know of.
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For my opening salvo:
One time I hadn't masturbated or had sex for like two weeks and I whacked off into my own eye accidentally becoz I wuz just that pent up.
Tell your friends.